Meg at the Most

A little bit of sweetness

tinalikesbutts:

Fun fact: John Cleese was actually supposed to say some really long and complicated name, but he forgot it and just said, “Tim” and everyone just rolled with it.

(Source: smallnartless, via awkward-aeries)

got a B+ in my research and creative writing class. Why? Because I don’t actually research for my creative writing. I would be bitter, but I find my best work in all my writing, not just my creative work, comes when I really understand something. That kind of research is through living it. (Hence why I’m in English and Women’s Studies. I live and breathe women’s lit hehe.)

These days, before we talk about misogyny, women are increasingly being asked to modify our language so we don’t hurt men’s feelings. Don’t say, “Men oppress women” – that’s sexism, as bad as any sexism women ever have to handle, possibly worse. Instead, say, “Some men oppress women.” Whatever you do, don’t generalise. That’s something men do. Not all men – just some men.

This type of semantic squabbling is a very effective way of getting women to shut up. After all, most of us grew up learning that being a good girl was all about putting other people’s feelings ahead of our own. We aren’t supposed to say what we think if there’s a chance it might upset somebody else or, worse, make them angry. So we stifle our speech with apologies, caveats and soothing sounds. We reassure our friends and loved ones that “you’re not one of those men who hate women”.

What we don’t say is: of course not all men hate women. But culture hates women, so men who grow up in a sexist culture have a tendency to do and say sexist things, often without meaning to. We aren’t judging you for who you are but that doesn’t mean we’re not asking you to change your behaviour. What you feel about women in your heart is of less immediate importance than how you treat them on a daily basis.

You can be the gentlest, sweetest man in the world yet still benefit from sexism. That’s how oppression works.